

How do you teach kids about taxes? Eat 38% of their ice cream.How do you measure the mass of an influencer's following? By Instagrams!.

You can't spell par entry without "try.".What do you call two monkeys who share an Amazon Prime account? Prime mates.When a toddler reaches the "why?" stage, it's like opening a bottle of champagne-once it's uncorked, there's no going back.At least she inherited my sense of humor. My kid gave me a 'World's Best Dad' mug.I thought it would be rude to interrupt her! I haven't spoken to my wife in four years.That's ridiculous, I didn't even know it was today! My kid is blaming me for ruining their birthday.What vegetable is cool, but not that cool? Radish.I wish my gray hair started in Las Vegas because what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? Where's popcorn?.What's the difference between a man's wallet before and after kids? There are pictures where the money used to be.I'm thinking I should do lunges to stay in shape.Am I the only man my wife has ever dated? Unfortunately yes, she said the others were all nines or tens!.


#Lame dad jokes crack#
He'll simply have to crack a smile when you tell him you're on the "seafood diet"-you see food, then you eat it! ( ba-dum tss). We've gathered the best dad jokes to share with your old man on any occasion, whether that's one of his Father's Day messages or simply a good morning text. An indignant dad might ask, what separates a regular joke from a dad joke? Well, according to Miriam Webster, they're a "wholesome joke" that tends to have a punchline that's "an obvious or predictable pun or play on words." Sound familiar? These endearingly cringe-worthy, corny one-liners are a childhood staple! And TBH, sometimes, they're so bad that they're actually funny. Whether your Dad has a funny bone or not, chances are he's told a few dad jokes in his time.
